Halloween Hiccup

I haven’t taken pictures of the hamsters in their itty-bitty costumes…. I am sorry.

BUT I do have a good excuse.

The dog didn’t eat it. Not even Hurricane Sandy blew it away. Oh not it didn’t.
I got a job! 

And as far as pathetic excuses go, this is right up there but I have been ignored and discarded for so long by potential employers that finally being given a decent job with decent pay and decent hours causes for lots of celebrations. Hence I have lacked the hamster-diary-motivation to take pictures of the hamsters in their halloween costumes. I will get on it! Probably Friday-ish time.

Just if you were hoping for a hamster halloween treat, you will have to hold on a wee sec.

Anyways, hope everyone has exciting plans for this gloomy Wednesday!

I have my Queen of Hearts costume at the ready and totally prepared to freeze my ass off on the walk to the pub. No pain, no gain right?

 So, 2 questions for my lovelies today.

1. What are you dressing up as for Halloween? 
2. What is your one piece of advice for starting a new job? Im a tad nervous after all this time part-timing…

Silhouettes and Shadows

You remember that black and white gallery I did a while back now?? And how successful it was with lots of pictures of the blogosphere’s furries all looking dramatic and mysterious in black and white photos?!

Well I have a new photography challenge for you all. Camera’s at the ready folks!!

While holding Dexter the other night I held him up (all lion king style) and took a picture of him on my phone. The TV screen behind him was white at the time of the snap and so the picture came out a little different to how I was expecting.
Different but totally awesome…

It got me thinking… another gallery was in order!!!

So folks, in honour of the dark and shadowy November month coming – take your best silhouette or shadow of your pet and send it to my email – contact page here – with the subject line “Silhouettes and Shadows Gallery“

Any creature, big or small, is welcome and I shall do the gallery on this SATURDAY (the 3rd) so make sure your pics are emailed to me before Friday midnight! Lets make this one a good’un!!

Good luck!!!

Top 10 Weirdest Web Searches

I thought I would dedicate this post to all those people out there suffering with Monday Morning Blues. 
These are genuine internet search terms that have people have quite honestly typed into their computers and come across my blog as a result.
Brace yourselves ladies and gentlemen

10.
“My hamster peed in my bed, how can I discipline him?”
If only this tortured hamster owner had commented or asked me! I could have easily told him that 3 minutes on the naughty step without any cuddles or attention is the way to discipline this furry fiend. Sit down with your hamster after this time and ask for an apology! If the hamster refuses to say sorry, leave them on the naughty step for a further 3 minutes. Its the only way these hamster learn anonymous worrier! If all else fails, take treats off the menu! That hamster will eventually crack under the pressure and peeing in the bed will be a distant memory for you both!

9.
“do hamsters love?”
Now this is rather deep and philosophical for my little blogging brain. And perhaps for every other human being. I mean if by love you mean spontaneously crap on your sofa, nibble the cage bars loudly until the early hours of the morning and wee on your nice clean new top when you’re running late for something, then yes – hamsters lovely deeply and more meaningfully than any other mammal on the planet! But if you’re expecting a single red rose and a soppy note on your pillow one morning then I hate to say it but don’t keep your hopes up! They’re just not the romantic type; they’re more of the ‘treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen‘ variety.

8.
“is there such thing as a non smelly hamster”
I could dedicate an entire post for this very question but I will shorten down the message just for this curious web-searcher: Non-smelly hamsters are a mythical creature along with minotaur’s and unicorns. They are not a big as unicorns, its true, but they are in the same realm of Narnia as these majestic beings, just hiding in the shadows. The closest us mortal humans can get to such a rare beast is to clean your poor pets cage out more often!! They only smell if you don’t clean their living space regularly! Oh and if they are a girl hammy on heat then they pong something nasty and there is no amount of cage-scrubbing that will rid you of that odour. Sorry.

7.
“how to milk a hamster”
Firstly, strap your hamster into a pet-safe harness and put your protective goggles and gloves on – safety first kids!! Secondly, locate the hamster’s udder using a magnifying glass and tweezers. Thirdly, are you SERIOUS?!?! Put the hamster down and take a step back. In fact take more than one step back!
Leave the room/neighbourhood.

6.
“is my male hamster fat or pregnant?”
Did you skip biology classes? Get back to school!! Damn!

 5.
“hamster porn”
Ooooh an old favourite here at Hamster Diaries. It pops up (s’cuse the pun) every day now. Even with a post titled ‘No Porn Here’, them randy hamster-porn-addicts think its a trick and click to view the post, just incase I’m hiding any saucy pictures! I’ll also mention there was a disturbing ‘hamster up the bum’ search… there are just no intelligent words to comment on that with. Moving on!

4.
“hamster breast milk for sale anywhere”
Are you the same guy who was asking me how to milk your hamster?!?! If yes, please refer to point number 7 for further information. If not and you are a completely different person, have you tried the milk isle at your local supermarket?? I hear Tesco are really widening their range…

3.
“how do I say ‘thank you’ in hamster language”
Great question my friend. When I treat my three hamsters to a new toy or a scrummy new treat, they all seem to thank me by peeing in my pockets or on the sofa. As hamsters don’t have sofa’s, the next best thing is their exercise wheel or gnawed on tunnel. Gently nudge their face with your claws (use a nail file to sharpen them bad boys up, really get into character with this) and reverse into position over your hamsters favourite object. Just when they look at you with a face of thanks, pee on their prized possessions. They will immediately feel the love and affection you hold for them.
Or you could just say ‘squeak, squeaky, squeakity, squeak.’ Essentially they are the same thing.

2.
“can I breast feed my hamster”
No madam, no you can not! NEXT!

1.
“Can you test a hamsters pregnancy with a human pregnancy test?”
Wow. Just wow! I wish there were words for this beautiful statement. Okay let me start off by saying top marks for imagination. Tip top marks there. I would also like to point out the differences between hamsters and humans; they’re different species. I’d imagine this would cause a problem when it comes to using a human pregnancy test (emphasis on the ‘human’ bit of that sentence). Also I’d like to see anyone try to get a hamster to pee on cue over a pregnancy test stick… All thats left after that search term is this highly appropriate meme:

I hope this has cheered up your Monday Blues!

I would like to emphasise that all of these search terms are 100% genuine from my WordPress ‘Search Engine Term’ section of my stat’s page over the entire time I’ve had this blog. I have tidied up the grammar of certain search terms (e.g. capitalised the i’s) for this post and also corrected the spelling of ‘hampsters’ in two of them.

Apart from that, I really couldn’t make this up! Gob-smacked doesn’t even come close! I hope you have enjoyed this!  

The Sunday Riddle #20

England is cold and dreary. More so than usual. At least that heavy fog has lifted now – was like living in a horror film for 3 days.

Now last weeks riddle just showed once again how clever you lot are! I’m seriously going to have to step it up I think!

You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

Hutch a Good Life and Animal Couriers got this one right and Cupcake was ever so close!!!
The ANSWER:

Corn on the cob. It makes sense now right?!

Mmmmm I love corn on the cob! And so do the hammys too! Ive put half a cob in before for them all a couple of times and they go completely loopy for it! I know you can buy prepacked corn on the cobs especially for small furries from the pet store, but they are dried out and dont look all that great. And to be honest, fresh veggies is much better for them in small doses, especially as an occasional treat!

Really fancying some corn now…. *drools*

Anyway, this weeks riddle for you… Its a real tricky one but actually is a pretty darn clever one I have even provided a hint too because I’m not sure if its near impossible without, plus it gives a good starting point…

I have five letters and people eat me.
When you remove my first letter I become a crime.
Remove my first two letters and I am an animal.
If you remove my first and last letters I’m a form of music.
What am I?

HINT: I am a fruit.

Good luck folks, really really really hoping someone out there can get this one. A difficult puzzle is always the most satisfying to solve!! And with this one, think of a list of fruits with 5 letters and then work through the conditions.
E.g. APPLE .. APPLE is not a crime therefore the answer cant possible be an apple! Gottit, GO GO GO!

Dora The Explorer Has Nothing On This Guy!

I have rediscovered some photos on my phone of when Casper went on an adventure around my mums kitchen.

I had taken him everywhere with me as I was paranoid about Casper’s seizure thingy. And as a result he became quite the little explorer.

Take said kitchen for example, Casper would run around the worktops, against the wall and sniff out all things worthy of being sniffed out. So this post is all of his adventure.
I just want to make sure you’re all aware that I was watching Casper very closely so he didnt get in any unsafe places or try to bite anything dangerous.

“There’s no food here. Screw this, Im off! Laters!!”

“Ohh a box. Smells nice. Maybe tastes as good? *nibbles* Nope, tastes awful!!”

“Right, If I stay close to this wall, I wont get lost…”

“Where did everybody go?! Sweet! Im on my own here, I can finally explore!!”

“Just keep running, just keep running, just keep running running running. What do we do? We run, run run!”

“Oh no, an obstacle! What is this huge, water filled device?! Perhaps its a giant drinking bottle for humans?”

The knives in the next few pictures have glass either side of them so were not a threat to my exploring hammy. Its a kind of decorational stand, so don’t worry, he wasn’t in dangers way, I swear! 

“Oh no, ANOTHER blockage! This adventure malarky is harder than it looks!”

“I feel like Im being watched here… Is that you puny human?!”

“Okay, you can pick me up now. Im ready to go back to bed… )”

So there you have it, a ham-tastic adventure!!
xxx

Casper Vs Eve – The Dance Off

Casper is recovering well and showing off.

I think what has happened here is that Casper has seen Eve’s talented monkey bar skills out of his cage window. He has recently started doing the monkey bars and quite honestly, putting Eve to shame!

Now the picture you see to your right is of Eve doing the monkey bars for one of the first times all them months back. You may notice she’s all slim and skinny, unlike the curvy podge-ball we now have Shes had 13 kids people, lighten up! She looks great now and looked great back then mmkays?!

Now Casper may not have quite the grace of Eve when it comes to doing the monkey bars, but he sure can get a groove on.

I videoed him doing this the other day and put it to some music and found myself giggling at how he looked like he was dancing away on the bars.

Then I looked up the old video I had of Eve doing the same.

Here are both videos for you to enjoy.

They will brighten up your day, promise!!
Who doesnt love seeing a hamster splat on the cage floor after getting too cocky on the ceiling?! ;D

Casper’s rave cannot be seen if you are viewing from Germany, I keep picking music that isnt allowed somewhere or rather, but it should work for the rest of you

Enjoy!!

And if you needed some more furry dancing cuteness, here is Eve on her bars. This is from a while back, you may remember the hilarious splat to the floor right at the end of it

All Fancy Dress

I am going a little bit off topic here by reviewing a fancy dress website (not for cute furries) but I want to share all the same.

Halloween is around the corner and I don’t want to just dress up my pets here. I want in on the action too!!!
So looking on Google, you can be spoilt for choice on sites to buy costumes from. All boasting great prices, fast delivery etc etc its hard to pick one!

Anyway my review is about the site allfancydress.com where I ended up buying my outfit from.

AllFancyDress.com banner, perfect for Halloween, non?!

I am going to be honest here, I am a little bit mixed about my experience.
More positive than negative by all means, however little niggles I feel I should mention.
Let me explain.

First of all, the site itself looks great. Everything is set out clearly and finding something specific couldn’t be easier as there is a search bar as well as really simple sub-menu’s to whittle choices down! When I wasn’t too sure what I was looking for, browsing everything girly was equally as easy.

So far so good.

Picture from AllFancyDress.com

After literally hours of browsing I chose my costume. Something cute and sexy – perfect for my Halloween party; The Queen of Hearts.
On the site it looks gorgeous! And as far as fancy dress costumes go, the price of the outfit is actually pretty reasonable. Visiting other fancy dress sites and comparing prices, it was the same if not cheaper than the vast majority of others so definitely had my mind made up. I even added the optional extras of the high socks! If I’m going to dress up, Im going all out!!

If I’m being brutally honest, the socks were very pricey. I could get them for £2 on a separate site but for ease (and sheer laziness perhaps) I ordered them off the same site for an addition £4.99.

Onto postage and delivery.
The banner on site is a little misleading. Yes there are free delivery options, but you have to be in Essex to be able to pick it up from the warehouse. Super for Essex-dwellers. Not so great for customers in other county’s.
Selecting standard Royal Mail postage was an extra £3.99… not the cheapest postage I’ve seen about but all the same it would be a quick delivery (within 2 days) and had to be signed for. So basically I had my peace of mind.

Still pretty good so far. 

My parcel arrived 2 days later. YAY!

Opening the package the costume I had chosen looked great set out on the floor (I had to put all the ribbons and bows on by hand which got a little confusing when there weren’t instructions or a guide but it didn’t take long to sort out).

YAY for high socks, boo for expensiveness!

Okay so trying the costume on was a different story.
There is a yellow dress and the black and red over-dress pulls over the yellow dress with a ribboned up corset bit at the back.

The underneath dress (the yellow bit) is super unflattering. I’m sure the woman on the packaging was wearing a completely different one! The elasticated chest bit pulls the whole dress up uncomfortably high and when I pulled it down I managed to pull the stitching apart where the skirt and top bit were sewn together and had to bodge it together with my not-so-great sewing skills.

The black and red dress pulls on and is then ribboned up. Now I’m going to sound like a right nit-picking b*tch here, but I ordered the dress in SMALL (this is size 8-10 dress size and as a curvy size 8 I expect to fit nicely into the small) and even when the top dress was ribboned up as tight as it could possible go, it still hung off me. Not a good hang too, a very unflattering hang. So basically this not-so-great sewer is going to have to alter it.
I’m going to have to take 2 of the 6 dress panels out so that it fits properly to give you an idea of how off the size is.

On a more positive note; the tiara headband, the socks and the gloves look fab! They really complete what would be a really pretty costume. Just got to have some alterations made – good job I have time to fix it up before Halloween!!!

All in all, I would recommend All Fancy Dress. 

P.S. I did check for hamster costumes (not that I would cheat on making them myself, just looked out of curiosity) but unfortunately they don’t stock hamster sized outfits.
Back to hammy-shenanigans tomorrow folks!

Another Visit To The Vet

It has been a week since Casper had a little accident. You remember the picture…
… He managed to rip his nail off and get it infected. Typical dramatic hamster.
Anyways, I got him an appointment for yesterday afternoon and the verdict is in!

We saw a very nice male vet who seemed to be a little more thorough with him than the other vet. He examined his toe (the big ugly scab fell off this morning so it looked remarkably clean and healthy) and he said that it looked like it was healing well despite the lack of the antibiotics. He also said the redness of the toe is because the new nail is growing through it making it a little sore, BUT he hasnt nibbled or gnawed on his nail which is a very good sign

Now onto my main worry; Casper’s seizure. 

The vet suggested it could have been a one off, didnt have an explaination as to why, just said as it has only happened once, they can’t assume its anything serious… yet. If it happens again it could be a sign of a brain disease (which sounds super scary I dont like the thought of my Casper having something seriously wrong with him)

But for now he doesn’t have a worry in the world, which is lovely. I can finally stop fretting over his every movement

He also said that if he was to get another infection another antibiotic would be used incase the original drug caused the fit. He did worry me when he said “but the one he was on tends to be the safest for small furries.” …No more infections or accidents please Cas! I don’t fancy you going on some risky drug!!!

And the vet very nicely didn’t charge me for the visit.
Its been a good day!

Drunk?! I’m Just Taking My Hamster For A Drive Officer!

I love it when hamsters randomly pop up in news stories. The latest hamster news had me stunned. You actually cannot make this cr*p up!

I got this article from the Metro and provided you all with the link to the online article at the end so you can check it out for yourselves!

Police in the US took a hamster into ‘protective custody,’ after it was found running free in the car of a suspected drunk driver.

In the early hours of Tuesday morning, officers in Oregon pulled over a driver suspected of driving under the influence. Whilst chatting to  the driver, the officers noticed that there was a hamster in her lap! She then put the hamster on the dashboard and was prominently arrested.

And get this, it took 3 offices to re-capture the little hamster from inside the car! Now that is a scene I’d like to see on ‘Cops with Cameras’  

The driver didnt know why she brought the hamster on the trip and even claimed to have no-one to come pick the critter up so they should ‘just kill it’ !!!
The police did not harm the hamster in any way but the furries whereabouts has not been stated in the article.

I hope its with a loving owner now, not someone who can so readily condemn it to death and endanger it like she did. Why this woman had a hamster in the first place when she is in no frame of mind to properly care for a pet is beyond me! Grrr!

This post actually coincides with a post from a fellow blogger that was on the topic of pet abandonment…
This poem by HutchAGoodLife is a fabulous and moving piece of writing and this latest hamster news has just made me want to share it more! Not quite hamster abandonment but with the same message and meaning to it.

Love your pet, give ‘em and loving squeeze and don’t let them go.
They are family members not accessories.

Read the full article here!

Good News

How many of you bunch watch Russell Howard’s Good News (BBC 3) ???

Well I am a big fan, I love his comedy to pieces!! I love Russell Howard and have been to see him in London too  Anyway, I am going off point here!
On last Thursday’s show, there was a section of the show that had me giggling that little bit harder than normal. Why? Because there were hamsters involved! Hence I thought I would share the hammy-giggles here!

Warning: The language is a little explicit so if you don’t like it, just skip today’s post I don’t want to offend anyone